Ask Sophie - intuitive life coach

Trust issues in relationships

05/04/2015 01:11

Trust issues in relationships

We've all been there at some point in our lives. They say trust takes time to build but mere moments to destroy. I was broken hearted when I found clear evidence of a lover's betrayal - on our second year anniversary. I felt dazed, angry and sick to my stomach. It was as though he stabbed me right in the heart.

How could he do this to me? What have I done to deserve this?

I kept on asking, begging and pleading for answers but I received none. I blamed him. And when I couldn't bear being disappointment or angry anymore, I ended up blaming myself. Fast forward some years later and BAM, there I was again being cheated on. Little did I understand how much power my thoughts and feelings were carrying. I had attracted these horrifying moments in my life! It was a hard pill to swallow, especially as an enthusiast of "positive thinking". Why did bad things keep happening to me?

How? I was in denial. Positive thinking is just that, positive THINKING. It is not the same as positive feeling. The mind may be fooled but the body seldom lies. Deep inside I held a belief of unworthiness. Deep inside I felt unlovable. Deep inside I trusted no one. How on earth did I acquire such awful beliefs? I look back on my childhood and suddenly it all made sense. These beliefs I carried were from emotional injuries long ago.

As infants we were born to love unconditionally. However in this world we've all endured some degree of emotional trauma. We learned that love was conditional, based on us behaving in a certain way. And when we didn't conform, we were punished. We have been incorrectly programed to believe that love needs to be earned, deserved.

I trusted my parents, my guardians with my heart and they disappointed me. Such emotional scars run deep and naturally, everytime we open our heart to someone, these feelings and fears will be triggered. I do not blame my parents for what they did, for they too are products of emotional injuries. I learned that it is important to take ownership of our feelings - not to apportion the blame. We cannot blame others for hurting us and neither should we blame ourselves. The law of attraction is merely presenting a mirror of what's really within you. It is not there to punish you but to serve as a reminder of some feelings and beliefs trapped inside you. 

With sincere emotional clearing you will find that your law of attraction will change and quickly. You will no longer be a magnet for partners or events that make you mistrust. Your existing partner may even change his/her ways miraculously overnight just by you doing this clearing alone!

So have faith, you are not cursed or doomed to be in unloving relationships. Honour your feelings. Experience them and then release them.

If you wish to explore this personal matter further, please see me for a friendly personal consultation.

Wishing you love and happiness,

Sophie x

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Love, Life and Destiny Guru

Dating, Relationship and emotional wellbeing Advisor

Motivational Speaker

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